Remembrance by Choice

There is no pain so great as the memory of joy in present grief.


It happens whether we want it to or not–change. Memory lives.

Another marker of loss sounds like sighing.

There was the first 4th of July without him, then the second, then the third, fourth, and fifth. And the memories of past fireworks over the White Mountains come down like hail, sharp and insistent.

Not all memories are worth keeping, but we aren’t in charge of that, are we?


I have come to realize that we can be in (at least) two different places at once; why not? Particles do it. Quantum physics says so. The “experiencing self” and the “remembering self” are two different selves. Right now, my experiencing self is full of stress because I have a deadline coming up, while my remembering self is drifting through past summers.


Memories need coating, like M&Ms.
During the day, that nightmare wasn’t so bad, was it?
Remembering our lost love is sugar-sweet; usually only the best times come through.
That’s okay with me.
I don’t mind selective memory.
I think if we remembered everything we would go mad.



The Riddle of Experience vs. Memory
Using examples from vacations to colonoscopies, Nobel laureate and founder of behavioral economics Daniel Kahneman reveals how our “experiencing selves” and our “remembering selves” perceive happiness differently. This new insight has profound implications for economics, public policy — and our own self-awareness.



Time moves in one direction, memory in another.
William Gibson 

Why is memory so complex?

2 thoughts on “Remembrance by Choice

  1. One more gem! You hit the nail on the head once agin. Love ya

    1. Thanks Marj. I appreciate every read and every share.

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